A frazzled mom's survival guide

Everytime I mop the Kitchen Floor...... ........Something is bound to happen. About two hours after I cleaned the kitchen floor. Now I say cleaned because mopped implies that I only used a mop, no I scrubbed the floor,on hand and knee.I removed every hint of oatmeal or spaghetti. It was spotless. Also, in my quest for household cleanliness I bathed the children. I then proceeded to take a much deserved break. I saw Justin go into the kitchen, but thought what can he do in there. (List to follow.) I made a video to remember him by after I sent him off to the wilderness camp for wayward toddlers. I it would be amusing here. Enjoy. Oh yes here is the much anticipated list of things that a toddler can do in a kitchen that I thought was childproofed... 1. Dump a pot plant all over the floor. 2. Eat dirt. 3. Eat trash... (Reminder get a lock for the trash can.) 4. Empty all dishes from the cabinets. 5. Start a heavy metal band with your pots. 6. Invite sisters to join band and and go on tour

This was not my idea, but a riot all the same. We were visiting Aunt Coralee and Uncle Rich, and Who would have thought that Uncle Rich was a one man amusement park for toddlers. He made them into burritos, then put peanut butter on their feet for the dog to lick off. I don't think muffin liked foot taste, she didn't seem all that excited about the peanut butter, but she licked enough off to have them squealing. and wanting to put more on. He wrestled. When we thought he was completly out of ideas he brought out a roll of paper towels and some tape. He then turned my kids into deer, kittens, unicorns and puppies. They had a blast and didn't want to leave. And just when I thought that there could be no more he broke out the pinto beans. Things I learned 1. Who needs Carowinds when you have a dog and some peanut butter. 2. The best things in life really are free. 3. We need to visit Aunt Coralee and Uncle Rich way more often.

I decided today was the day to tackle the grime on the kitchen floor. I scrubbed until the floor was at least clean enough to eat from. It took three hours, although there were frequent time outs to comfort the one year old who insisted on running through the kitchen full speed. He'll make a great stuntman one day, I never knew people could really fall like that. Now before you go calling anybody on me he only fell once, after that he whined at my makeshift child gate wanting back in so he could run across the floor again. With colossal task completed next on the list was lunch. Since we went blueberry picking yesterday the kids wanted to make a blueberry pie. Piemaking commences, I admonished the kids that I don't need help this time, and I get the crust made. I will spare those who are a little germ apohbic the details of this process as it occurs with my children, the earlier warning must not have been heard. Now time for lunch. To appease the kids I pull out the craft bo